I approach this post with some apprehension and sheepishness. My last blog post was, yeah, pretty negative. Hey, I was frustrated. And I heard about it (thanks Amie, for an honest and informative email exchange). I’m not retreating from anything I said because I still believe every word but, yeah, it could have been phrased a little less… well… pissy.
So, this time we’re going to talk about something much more positive. It isn’t new, really, but I’m encountering it in a framework that’s a lot different from my previous work environment. I’m speaking to everyone, but I’m particularly embracing my fellow perfectionists, because we’re a persistent lot who can easily drive ourselves (and those around us) crazy by never letting something go because it can always, always be made better. And here it is:
#3: It’s perfectly healthy to say, “It’s good,” let it go and move on.
Example: A challenging and frequently baffling research paper for my Humanities class. I started work on it more than a month ago and have doggedly worked on it every day since then. As the deadline approached it became obvious that it wasn’t going to be the perfect paper I wanted it to be. I didn’t have the depth of knowledge I wish I had, and I didn’t have an endless well of time.
Though it was frustrating, this was one of those situations when “good enough” was going to have to be good enough. I realized that, even though I still had a full day before the deadline, spending even half that time pounding on the keyboard wasn’t going to make a good paper perfect. And would the incremental improvement really be worth the worry, caffeine jitters and additional grey hairs? I gave the paper a final look-over, exported the PDF, uploaded it and… let it go.
Nothing is perfect. Nothing is ever perfect. Working and working on something, trying to inch closer to that infinitely far-away benchmark of perfection, may seem like a noble goal but it is also futile. You will never get there. Sorry. You won’t. No one does. Perfect is unattainable. Life will be less crazy-making when you not only accept that fact, but embrace it.
Our Type A society has somehow brainwashed us into believing that “good” = “bad”, and that only “great” or “perfect” are acceptable. But that’s messed up. Perfect isn’t acceptable because it just isn’t possible. Bad is abundantly possible. Good is something to be celebrated, not settled for.
There is nothing wrong with good. I was tempted to add the word “just” before that, to say “just good,” but that’s unfair. Good is good, and if you produce something that is “just” good you should celebrate both it and your accomplishment. Think about all the dreck that pops up on television, in theatres, on Netflix, then consider how many billions of dollars Hollywood spent to produce that dreck. Think about how easy it is to ruin a simple batch of chocolate chip cookies, by flubbing the ingredients or baking a few minutes too long.
Lots of money, lots of time and even the presence of chocolate does not automatically result in yummy goodness. It’s important that we celebrate producing something that is, yes, “just” good… because it’s more rare than we allow ourselves to realize.
Work on something — a paper, a painting, a home improvement project, a poem — as long as your energy, time and resources allow. Be open and aware of the point when you’re reached the “good” threshold, then step back. Ask yourself, Am I continuing to work on this because I honestly have the time and talent to improve it, or because I want it to be perfect? If it’s the former and time allows, then carry on and have fun. But if it’s the latter, consider whether or not what you have done is good “enough” to let go and move on to something else.
If the answer to that is “yes,” then congratulate yourself, reward yourself even, and then… move on. Time spent trying to perfect one thing is wasted, because it will never be perfect. Time spent moving on to something else that could also be good means there is that much more goodness in the world. Which sounds like a more rewarding path to follow?
